My Deployment Phases

By: Bailey Kee

Phase 1: Before Deployment

There is a lot of built up anxiety, on both ends. I can’t for sure say what my boyfriend was feeling, but I know he was dreading going. For me, I was so scared. Not because he was leaving, but because I wasn’t sure if I would get him back. 

Phase 2: The Night Before They Leave

There was an arguement, we were both not wanting this to happen, not willing to face reality I suppose. It wasn’t a terrible arguement, and we got over it very quickly. I was just so ready for him to get over there, so we could create a routine, so I would know if/when I would get to talk to him. That was a big concern. I wanted to make sure he was okay.

Phase 3: More than 7,000 Miles Away 

At first, I felt like death. I felt like time was going to go by so slow. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I always had my phone beside me, I worried constantly. I looked online for things that would ease my mind. Not a good idea, so don’t do it. Trust me. We didn’t get to talk much at all for the first couple of weeks.

Phase 4: The Middle: 

I consider R&R halfway, since I am halfway to seeing him for it lol. I am doing a lot better. I keep myself busy, try not to worry much, cause honestly what is worrying about something you have COMPLETELY NO CONTROL OVER going to solve? If something is going to happen, it would happen anywhere. Them being deployed isn’t an automatic death sentence. I have my bad days where I cry and cry, but then I’m fine. I just miss him. I’ve never longed to be with someone so bad that it hurt. I physically miss him, his touch, his kiss, the way he brushes my hair out of my face and just stares at me. I know if I can make it through this, anybody else can. You just need to pray for them. Praying gets me through my darkest days, and I don’t feel so alone.

This is all for now, I will update more :) I’m not through this deployment, yet!

Thanks for reading.

p.s. not hearing anything from this ISN’T the end of the world. You don’t know what went on that day. They could be really tired, be having a blackout (cut off from all outside communication for a few days.) or they just didn’t feel like talking. Whatever the reason may be, know that “No news, is good news.” You live by that now. 

-♥